something about "LOVE"

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something about "LOVE"

Post  Nathan on Thu Sep 09, 2010 4:48 pm

let's talk about love here..




first i wanna ask, will you be with someone who loves you so much but u don't love him/her that much?
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Re: something about "LOVE"

Post  Alex on Fri Sep 10, 2010 4:01 am

a hot topic!

I think it would be okay if the relationship was still developing.

Though if you found yourself thinking that you would never feel the same way about someone as they feel about you, then the relationship probably won't work.

As much as one person can love another, it needs to be mutual. There is no secret way to make someone fall in love with you. if they don't feel it. they don't feel it.

These sort of relationships are very comfortable and safe, but not very enjoyable... and if you want a relationship to last, it needs to be enjoyable for both people.

Nathan, you've have had this experience? Wink
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Re: something about "LOVE"

Post  Nathan on Fri Sep 10, 2010 12:36 pm

yeah, I quite agree with what you said. Love should be bilateral, or it'll be hard to last. Someone may easily feel tired if he/she's the only one who's trying to maintain their love.
Yeah i've had this experience but now i asked this question because a girl loves me so much but i don't love her that much. Though i was moved by her at one night a few days ago, i'm still thinking if i should accept her. Mad
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Re: something about "LOVE"

Post  Cherry on Sat Sep 11, 2010 5:39 pm

Nathan wrote:yeah, I quite agree with what you said. Love should be bilateral, or it'll be hard to last. Someone may easily feel tired if he/she's the only one who's trying to maintain their love.
Yeah i've had this experience but now i asked this question because a girl loves me so much but i don't love her that much. Though i was moved by her at one night a few days ago, i'm still thinking if i should accept her. Mad
i think if you were moved , kind of love her and get the potential or possibility to develop the love, you're supposed to accept her. but you have to make a decision by your real feeling.
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Re: something about "LOVE"

Post  Alex on Sat Sep 11, 2010 6:17 pm

Cherry wrote:
i think if you were moved , kind of love her and get the potential or possibility to develop the love, you're supposed to accept her. but you have to make a decision by your real feeling.

This is Chinese for going on dates with someone? Laughing
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Re: something about "LOVE"

Post  Nathan on Sat Sep 11, 2010 6:35 pm

Cherry wrote:
Nathan wrote:yeah, I quite agree with what you said. Love should be bilateral, or it'll be hard to last. Someone may easily feel tired if he/she's the only one who's trying to maintain their love.
Yeah i've had this experience but now i asked this question because a girl loves me so much but i don't love her that much. Though i was moved by her at one night a few days ago, i'm still thinking if i should accept her. Mad
i think if you were moved , kind of love her and get the potential or possibility to develop the love, you're supposed to accept her. but you have to make a decision by your real feeling.

Whatever, i'm trying to accept her. But it may not be 'love', it may be 'feels we're suitable '.
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Re: something about "LOVE"

Post  Nathan on Sat Sep 11, 2010 6:37 pm

Alex wrote:
Cherry wrote:
i think if you were moved , kind of love her and get the potential or possibility to develop the love, you're supposed to accept her. but you have to make a decision by your real feeling.

This is Chinese for going on dates with someone? Laughing
ha i've no idea
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Re: something about "LOVE"

Post  Alex on Sat Sep 11, 2010 6:45 pm

Nathan wrote:
Alex wrote:
Cherry wrote:
i think if you were moved , kind of love her and get the potential or possibility to develop the love, you're supposed to accept her. but you have to make a decision by your real feeling.

This is Chinese for going on dates with someone? Laughing
ha i've no idea

Dating is a form of courtship, and may include any social activity undertaken by, typically, two persons with the aim of each assessing the other's suitability as a partner in an intimate relationship or as a spouse.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dating

This is why western people 'date' more people than a typical Chinese person... we don't 'love' everyone we date, we date to decide if we 'love'.... and if we don't think love will develop, we end it and move on. I also think 'love' is a different concept between my culture and typical Chinese culture.

So I guess I've had more girlfriends in my life than you Mr. Nathan, but you've probably 'loved' more women than me... but only because of different cultures

Wink
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Re: something about "LOVE"

Post  Nathan on Sat Sep 11, 2010 7:11 pm

Alex wrote:
Nathan wrote:
Alex wrote:
Cherry wrote:
i think if you were moved , kind of love her and get the potential or possibility to develop the love, you're supposed to accept her. but you have to make a decision by your real feeling.

This is Chinese for going on dates with someone? Laughing
ha i've no idea

Dating is a form of courtship, and may include any social activity undertaken by, typically, two persons with the aim of each assessing the other's suitability as a partner in an intimate relationship or as a spouse.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dating

This is why western people 'date' more people than a typical Chinese person... we don't 'love' everyone we date, we date to decide if we 'love'.... and if we don't think love will develop, we end it and move on. I also think 'love' is a different concept between my culture and typical Chinese culture.

So I guess I've had more girlfriends in my life than you Mr. Nathan, but you've probably 'loved' more women than me... but only because of different cultures

Wink

so now i date girls just like western people? ha. I've got no idea who will be my girlfriend or which one i do love the most. I was just dating them and waiting for one of them. wow sounds like i was a bad guy Laughing

yeah you've had more girlfriends than me Laughing Chinese culture makes people being careful in love and i think they're not brave enough sometimes. Western people know that they're finding someone and they change their girlfriends or boyfriends more easily and decidedly than Chinese people, in order to find the one they think they can share life with. Is it right?
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Re: something about "LOVE"

Post  Alex on Sat Sep 11, 2010 7:51 pm

Nathan wrote:
so now i date girls just like western people? ha. I've got no idea who will be my girlfriend or which one i do love the most. I was just dating them and waiting for one of them. wow sounds like i was a bad guy Laughing
Not at all! You are normal! Dating is what most people do! A romantic relationship is different to a normal friendship in many ways. Dating is essential to really know how compatible you would be with someone.

Nathan wrote:
Chinese culture makes people being careful in love and i think they're not brave enough sometimes.
Maybe careful isnt the right word... but I know what you mean. Conservative and formalised in majority, perhaps.
Nathan wrote:
Western people know that they're finding someone and they change their girlfriends or boyfriends more easily and decidedly than Chinese people, in order to find the one they think they can share life with. Is it right?

Well you dont always date someone thinking that they are someone to spend a life with. Most relationships are not formed on love, they are formed on attraction, that will either develop into love or end later on.

I have heard of some Chinese boys the first time they meet a girl talk about the fact they have a house, money, a car etc... that sounds crazy to talk about the first time meeting a girl ha

Money can't buy a personality Laughing
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Re: something about "LOVE"

Post  Alex on Sat Sep 11, 2010 8:27 pm

I think a big cultural difference is that dating in China is a really big commitment. You really have to fight hard, in some cases 'proof your love' (whatever that means) to even get a girl to go on a date with you... There really is too much focus on what others think.

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Re: something about "LOVE"

Post  guganlingzhi on Sun Sep 12, 2010 6:30 am

Alex wrote:I think a big cultural difference is that dating in China is a really big commitment. You really have to fight hard, in some cases 'proof your love' (whatever that means) to even get a girl to go on a date with you... There really is too much focus on what others think.

i agree with you. Most of the relationships should go from like to love. if people start a relationship according to the goal of getting married, that may place too much pressure on the relationship.
Western care the personality when they choose lifelong partner while Chinese care the social status and wealth.
if the concepts don't change, we'll forever choose our partners under these horrible values!
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Re: something about "LOVE"

Post  Alex on Sun Sep 12, 2010 6:36 am

guganlingzhi wrote:
Alex wrote:I think a big cultural difference is that dating in China is a really big commitment. You really have to fight hard, in some cases 'proof your love' (whatever that means) to even get a girl to go on a date with you... There really is too much focus on what others think.

i agree with you. Most of the relationships should go from like to love. if people start a relationship according to the goal of getting married, that may place too much pressure on the relationship.
Western care the personality when they choose lifelong partner while Chinese care the social status and wealth.
if the concepts don't change, we'll forever choose our partners under these horrible values!

Its slowly changing I think as China gets richer and the overwhelming majority of Chinese people are moving into a middle class lifestyle. Depends on their family I guess, what mum and dad think is really important to children here
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Re: something about "LOVE"

Post  mani on Sun Sep 12, 2010 6:59 am

date her and figure it out~ha lol!
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Re: something about "LOVE"

Post  Alex on Sun Sep 12, 2010 7:04 am

mani wrote:date her and figure it out~ha lol!

Thats my advice too. Nothing wrong with going on a dinner/movie date with her and just seeing if there is any electricity between you
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Re: something about "LOVE"

Post  Nathan on Tue Sep 14, 2010 2:20 pm

Alex wrote:
Nathan wrote:
so now i date girls just like western people? ha. I've got no idea who will be my girlfriend or which one i do love the most. I was just dating them and waiting for one of them. wow sounds like i was a bad guy Laughing
Not at all! You are normal! Dating is what most people do! A romantic relationship is different to a normal friendship in many ways. Dating is essential to really know how compatible you would be with someone.

Nathan wrote:
Chinese culture makes people being careful in love and i think they're not brave enough sometimes.
Maybe careful isnt the right word... but I know what you mean. Conservative and formalised in majority, perhaps.
Nathan wrote:
Western people know that they're finding someone and they change their girlfriends or boyfriends more easily and decidedly than Chinese people, in order to find the one they think they can share life with. Is it right?

Well you dont always date someone thinking that they are someone to spend a life with. Most relationships are not formed on love, they are formed on attraction, that will either develop into love or end later on.

I have heard of some Chinese boys the first time they meet a girl talk about the fact they have a house, money, a car etc... that sounds crazy to talk about the first time meeting a girl ha

Money can't buy a personality Laughing

i completely agree with you.
these days i've been bothered by some love problems, i'm afraid i can't write long here recently. i'll talk about it with you next time
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Re: something about "LOVE"

Post  Nathan on Tue Sep 14, 2010 2:25 pm

how to raise her hope in love again after she despairs of me?
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Re: something about "LOVE"

Post  Tim on Wed Sep 15, 2010 4:23 am

Love is blind.. Neal can explain what love is exactly..
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Re: something about "LOVE"

Post  Alex on Wed Sep 15, 2010 1:21 pm

Nathan wrote:how to raise her hope in love again after she despairs of me?

I will need more information before I offer my advice study

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Re: something about "LOVE"

Post  Nathan on Wed Sep 15, 2010 2:52 pm

Alex wrote:
Nathan wrote:how to raise her hope in love again after she despairs of me?

I will need more information before I offer my advice study

i'll talk about it with u this week Laughing
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single love

Post  woody on Wed Sep 15, 2010 3:21 pm

i hope my lover is a considerate person! Smile
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Re: something about "LOVE"

Post  Leaf.. on Wed Sep 15, 2010 3:27 pm

aha..love is so easy if you can stay naturally..
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i have the same question. and how can we become common freinds?

Post  (*^__^*) Yandy on Sun Dec 19, 2010 9:02 am

Nathan wrote:let's talk about love here..




first i wanna ask, will you be with someone who loves you so much but u don't love him/her that much?
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once one pair of valentines break up, can they be friends~!?

Post  (*^__^*) Yandy on Sun Dec 19, 2010 9:04 am

Tim wrote: Love is blind.. Neal can explain what love is exactly..
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how to do....

Post  (*^__^*) Yandy on Sun Dec 19, 2010 9:05 am

(*^__^*) Yandy wrote:
Tim wrote: Love is blind.. Neal can explain what love is exactly..
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